So here comes the date you’ve all been waiting for. Gun Media and IllFonic will drop the highly-anticipated game on May 26th, 2017.

Friday the 13th: The Game will launch with multiplayer-only gameplay allowing players for the very first time to take on the role of Jason Voorhees in his various incarnations throughout the storied franchise spanning three decades! This 1v7 asymmetric multiplayer title will pit Jason against seven counselors as they try to survive in three maps spanning Camp Crystal Lake, Higgins Haven and Packanack Lodge.

For those of you who aren’t interested in the multiplayer portion of the game can start to look forward to single player, which will follow as a free update this summer. Friday the 13th: The Game will be priced at $40USD.

Stay tuned to Yell! Magazine for more daily news.

According to multiple online sources such as THR and upcominghorrormovies.com, the F13 reboot, which has been rescheduled for release multiple times and filming was expected to begin in less than six, Paramount now has decided to shut down the latest iteration of F13th. No joke!

At the moment, reasons for pulling the plug is still unknown, but rumor is because of the poor performance of the studio’s horror movie, Rings. A horror reboot which generally received poor ratings and bowed to $13 million over the weekend. So the studio is second-guessing the F13 project entirely.

Breck Eisner (The Crazies, The Last Witch Hunter) was onboard the direct the film from a script by Aaron Guzikowski (Prisoners). The reboot was expected to be “unique retelling” of Jason’s origin story set between the late 70’s and early 80’s.

Stay tuned to Yell! Magazine for much more updates to come.

Their newest Buy or Die* 72 hours only design by @devondraws inspired by the golden age of VHS is available for purchase right now and will vanish forever on January 15th at 5PM EST. The killer Jason design will also be available on T-shirts, Tanktops, Baseball Tees, and Sweatshirts. There’s a good selection of garment styles, so grab your favorite today!

Please visit the Cavity Colors website for much more details and order options.

In a new interview, Platinum Dunes producers Brad Fuller and Andrew Form sat down with Collider to give horror hounds a snazzy new update. They confirmed the thirteenth Friday the 13th will be officially directed by Breck Eisner, who has previously directed The Last Witch Hunter and the remake of George A. Romero’s The Crazies in 2010. According to the producers, the new F13 script has been penned by Aaron Guzikowski (Prisoners) with shooting to finally begin in spring.

I’m here to say that we found the location. We have found the lake, we have found the camp. We found an amazing script by Aaron Guzikowski. Breck Eisner is directing the movie. That movie is shooting in early Spring.

A direct sequel to 2009 Friday the 13th couldn’t find traction, so the new sequel is taking on a “fresh” direction without completely forgetting about the old ones.

What we don’t want to do is alienate the audience who hasn’t seen the preceding 12 Friday the 13th movies. Aaron Guzikowski’s job, as challenging as it is, is to come up with a movie where if you haven’t seen any go the other ones, you can still come and see this one and love it and not feel like you’ve missed out on anything. And if you have seen the other ones, we want this to feel fresh.

The new Friday the 13th movie is currently scheduled for October 13th, 2017.

That’s right! The word on the street is that Paramount Pictures has given new release dates to Friday the 13th, including the haunting return of Samara Morgan in Rings. According to numerous sources, the upcoming Friday the 13th movie has been moved on the calendar from January 13th, 2017 to October 13th, 2017. A whooping 10 month delay, which almost sounds like a new record in my book.

The good news is Breck Eisner (The Crazies, The Last Witch Hunter) is currently in talks to direct the new Friday the 13th from an updated screenplay penned by Aaron Guzikowski (Prisoners), though not much about the film has been revealed at this stage.

Platinum Dunes producer Brad Fuller has described the film as an “origin-ish” story, whatever the hell means. As soon as another update comes along, we’ll be sure to keep you guys in the loop at Yell! Magazine.

Stay tuned!

Thanks… Billy? Bob? Billy-Bob?

Hey, isn’t that a scene from Total Recall? You know what that means! Hot, three-breasted Martian hooker action for any reader who manages to reach the end of this article. Don’t say I never reward with the gift of boobies. Speaking of unleashed sweater puppies, this is Yell! Magazine’s Friday The 13th Retrospective Part 2: Retrospective Harder!

In Part 1, we thoroughly examined Jason’s best kills and drooled over his sexiest victims. Well, I drooled. Maybe it’s a glandular problem. Or a horny-son-of-a-bitch problem. Either way, it’s a problem. The maid is getting tired of wiping up my drool puddles and other assorted puddles, which we won’t discuss at this particular junction in time. Suffice it to say, it’s never a good idea to take off your shoes in my house.

Where was I? Sorry, bodily fluids distract me something fierce. I blame myself for never moving past the masturbatory phase of my existence. What? I’m sharing, you ungrateful bastards! Sigh. Nobody loves me. Except lefty, righty, and Bambi the rhino horn sniffing hooker whose comatose form the plumber finally managed to pry off my crapper this week. (See: Top 10 Shark Movies and Top 10 Disappointing Threequels.) She was totally inappropriate for the tone of this article anyway. I need to call the escort agency for a replacement running gag whore… something in keeping with this retrospective…

WE HAVE A WINNAH!

Jason Lives: Friday The 13th Part VI

Or: Yeah, poke the dead serial killer with a lightning rod. What’s the worse thing that could happen?

Tommy Jarvis returns, played this time by Thom Matthews of Return Of The Living Dead. Jarvis wants to put his demons to sleep once and for all. Thus, he ventures to Jason’s final resting place in the hopes of reaching some form of closure by viewing the killer’s decomposing corpse. A bottle of Wild Turkey and enough Valium to anesthetize Richard Simmons works for me, but to each his own. In a twist nobody save a 5 year old could have predicted, Jarvis accidently, not to mention improbably, brings Jason back to life by sticking a metal pole in his body. Said pole is subsequently struck by lightning and before you can say, “It’s alive! It’s alive!” Jason is back to his old shenanigans.

Kind of you guys to bury me with my mask. Saves me the trouble of killing another fat kid.

Jason Lives is an odd duck. On the one hand, there’s a welcome sense of energy to the movie that wasn’t present in Part 5. On the other hand, the franchise’s growing penchant for gag kills was starting to become annoyingly too noticeable. For example, one chick gets cornered in an RV’s bathroom by Jason, he promptly shoves her head into the wall, which leaves a Looney Tunes-style imprint of her face on the other side. Hardy-har-har! What a kidder, that Jason. Another girl gets her head twisted all the way around by Jason’s newfound supernatural strength.

To make things worse, this is the only entry in the franchise without any nudity! None. Zip. Zilch. Nada. A whole lot of nada… nadalot? Teenagers bang, as usual, but they do it fully clothed. No nude skinny dipping scene. No gratuitous forest humping. What the hell?

BEST KILL: There really isn’t one. All of Jason’s victims buy the farm in completely unimaginative ways. So here’s a montage of every kill in the movie, maybe they’ll make more of an impact when strung together like this.

BEST BABE: How am I supposed to declare a winner when nobody gives up the goods? Sigh. Well, Darcy DeMoss, who is naked in everything else she’s ever starred in, is in the movie. So to keep you interested, here’s a totally random shot of her hidden assets.

Who was the first actor to reprise the Jason role for a second outing?

Crystal Lake. It’s the home of one Jason Voorhees, serial killer, mutant freak, occasional parasitic organism and part-time Popsicle time traveler. Not to be confused with the bodacious Debbie Sue Voorhees, co-star of Friday The 13th Part V. Speaking of which, here’s the boring part of her upper body.

You get the bottom half later on.

While the dead teenager genre was around long before the first Friday The 13th hit theaters, it’s hard to argue that the original 1980 stab-fest perfected the formula long before its subsequent, and absurdly numerous, sequels ran it into the ground. The series introduced one of the most widely recognized horror monsters in history, bared more naked breasts than your average old folks home after they run out of little red pills, came up with more inventive ways to maim someone than the Marquis de Sade, and grossed nearly half a billion worldwide.

So without further ado, here is Yell! Magazine’s Friday The 13th Retrospective, just in time for… a couple of weeks before Halloween. Just in time for pre-Halloween! Preween! Yeah, Preween. I’m totally trademarking that shit. Please say hello to the star of our show, Jason Voorhees! Take a big bow Jason, but watch out for that ax I left lying on the floor.

DOH!

Friday The 13th (1980)

OR: Teenagers and promiscuous sex. What could possibly go wrong?

Friday The 13th was like a shot of adrenaline to the horror genre. While the ’70s featured more psychological fright films, Friday The 13th was a sign of things to come in the ’80s. Deep thinking was out, blood and guts were in.

I really should pick up that damn ax…

Directed by Sean S. Cunningham, F13 went on to gross an astounding $40 million, dwarfing its $500,000 budget by an insane amount. Reviews were, of course, universally unfavorable, a fate that would befall every movie in the series. Fans, however, were well served by the goods on display. Speaking of goods, the series’ trademark T&A was first introduced here and would go on to corrupt young minds for generations to come. My right hand thanks you, Friday The 13th. It’s considerably larger and veinier than my left hand thanks to your copious masturbatory fodder.

This movie is perhaps best remembered for its shocking twist. Best remembered might be incorrect, after all, Drew Barrymore, in Scream’s opening moments totally forgot that the killer in Friday The 13th was Jason’s mother, rather than the masked one. Friday The 13th holds up remarkably well a full 31 years after its release. The series was at its best, still scary and many entries away from degenerating into self-parody. I would still recommend it to up-and-coming horror lovers. Of note: Final Girl™ Adrienne King would return for a minor, yet shocking, cameo in the sequel.

BEST KILL: A pre-fame Kevin Bacon gets it in the neck! I guess Momma Voorhees wanted to pre-murder him for Footloose.

BEST BABE: Jeannine Taylor. Minor nudity only, but check out that ferocious derriere!

More tits and bloody killings after the jump…

During a press round for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows, Platinum Dunes producer Brad Fuller confirmed Pam is “obviously” in the new horror film, but she won’t entirely appear like before.

Fuller said,

[It’s] origin-ish, but it’s an origin that no one has seen before. Obviously Pamela’s there, but it’s a little bit different from what you’ve seen before.

From my understanding, the new Friday the 13th film could be penned as a prequel, which potentially take us back to the origins of Jason. So maybe we’ll see some bad parenting from Pam, or perhaps the film will simply have flashbacks with her motivating Jason to murder camp counsellors like in previous sequels. Based on the details, Pam’s appearance isn’t really clear, but at least her presence is obviously confirmed.

Pamela Voorhees

In addition, Fuller mentioned that the latest draft of the story written by Aaron Guzikowski (Prisoners, Contraband) has “great characters,” which in my opinion the 2009 Friday the 13th lacked in a great degree.

Aaron’s story has great characters, and I think that in the same way that you have to relate to the turtles [in Platinum Dunes’ new TMNT movie], you kind of have to understand Jason Voorhees. So we go back and we kind of started over and work our way forward.

Paramount Pictures and Platinum Dune is currently targeting a January 13th, 2017 release for the new Friday the 13th.

Stay tuned to Yell! Magazine for much more updates to come.

You can definitely continue to take a light day and simply invest in a very limited Jason Lives – Midnight Madness t-shirt from Fright-Rags. That’s right! Fright-Rags is here to save your sorry ass with this awesome new tee honoring the sixth installment in the Friday the 13th franchise. It’s the sequel with the worst looking Jason outfit ever, yes those yellow garden gloves still aren’t in fashion yet, but the kills are remarkably brutal in this one.

The deadline to purchase this tee will be tomorrow at midnight. So act fast because they will be gone forever. You can pre-order online and your order will be available mid-June. It’s a little wait, but it’s worth it in my opinion.

The tees range from $18 to $28.

In the clip above, the iconic masked murderer is back again with another brutal kill. Jason Voorhees takes out his frustration on a camp counselor using a door and I promise you it gets extremely bloody. Probably one of the bloodiest kills from Jason yet.

Plus, if you remember Friday the 13th: Part 3 well, then the first thing you will notice is the excellent recreation and render of the environment from the movie. It looks like it’s beyond 100% accurate to the finest details. If this really is pre-alpha footage, I’m very impressed and I personally can’t wait to see the final version.

Friday the 13th: The game is officially slated to arrive on PC, PlayStation 4, and Xbox One in October. Stay tuned to Yell! Magazine for much more updates to come.