Top 10 Video Game Movies That Need To Be Made Or: Hey, Baby, Wanna Sit On My Casting Couch?

Top 10 Video Game Movies That Need To Be Made

Gamers have an odd relationship with movies based on video games. On the one hand, the thought of some Hollywood ace adapting our beloved characters for the big screen should be cause for celebration. On the other, well, just try to mention Uwe Boll to any gamer and watch him foam at the mouth. And let me tell you, it’s not happy foaming. It’s pure, unbridled hatred and rage at how the jewels of the video game industry get treated by movie makers. When all you can do is point to 1995’s Mortal Kombat and say: “Yeah, that one wasn’t so bad,” you know there’s a significant dearth of quality movies based on video games.

The problem is twofold. Firstly, much like many of the comic book films, there is a general lack of respect from film makers toward the original material. Sure, the game is loved by millions, has mass appeal, sold like hotcakes, and has a well-established world and characters… but let’s ignore all of that in favor of our vision. After all, we’re artists, they’re just video game makers, what do they know? Secondly, out of all the games turned into movies thus far, roughly 95% had very little story to speak of. Mortal Kombat? Fighter histories and motivations does not a movie make. Super Mario Bros.? Mario needs to save Princess Peach. Simple, yet they still managed to fuck that up. Resident Evil? They got the action right, but this is not a franchise known for its witty banter.

However, these faults describe the previous generation of movies based on video games. Since video games have become more and more cinematic, the next generation promises to be something totally different. And, for a change, Hollywood is finally taking a stab at adapting video games with actual plots, massive amounts of dialogue, and fully-developed characters with histories that go beyond “bad guy killed my (insert significant other here) so I’m entering this martial arts tournament to get revenge” cliché.

So, my faithful readers*, without further ado, here is Yell! Magazine’s Top 10 List Of Movies Based On Video Games That Need To Be Made, along with rumors, castings, potential pitfalls, and all the reasons why these films would kick ass.

*Except for that one reader who totally cheated on me with IGN. You know who you are. Bastard.

No.10 Uncharted

The plot:

Wise-ass adventurer Nathan Drake goes hunting for fabulous treasures all around the world with his sidekick and beautiful love interest(s) in tow. Huge amounts of cliff-climbing, spelunking, and gunfights ensue. Fun is had by all.

Why it could work:

Nathan Drake is Indiana Jones. And people love Indy. Hell, they even loved geriatric Indy. Drake is an easy-going hero, flippant but loyal and brave to a fault. With the correct handsome leading man he’ll easily appeal to a large demographic. Toss in some tomb raiding, complete with a series of traps still well-oiled after hundreds of years for some reason, a plucky reporter tagging along for some romantic sparks, marinate with some explosions and a treasure that ends up having a supernatural component, shake well and voila! Blockbuster!

Why it might not work:

It’s all about the acting. Casting is going to be key for this movie. If you choose actors devoid of chemistry for the roles of Nathan Drake and Elena Fisher, people won’t buy into their relationship. Drake is a wiseass with a heart of gold, imperfect casting would completely undermine the character’s charm.

Who should be involved:

Uncharted fans were in an uproar when Mark Wahlberg was announced as Nathan Drake a few months ago, soon followed by his “The Fighter” director David O. Russell. Online petitions were soon written up begging the studio to reconsider this. While Russell has the requisite action chops (Three Kings) to direct the movie, the dour, intense Wahlberg irked fans. Luckily, both men seem to have abandoned the project. In the minds of many fans, the perfect Nathan Drake would be Nathan Fillion. Not only does he resemble the character physically, but also his Captain Mal Reynolds on Firefly was essentially Nathan Drake… in space. A second possibility would be Josh Holloway from Lost, who might not look like the character but certainly possesses the right personality quirks required for the role.

Come on, Sony! They’re both named Nathan!

The potential:

A rip-roaring, summer action blockbuster capable of launching a movie franchise.

You’ll have to click through to find out what the other nine movies based on video games are…

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