Hatchet III (2013) – “Daddy?”

Hatchet III has more balls than gay porn, more blood and guts than an operating room’s floor, and more laughs than, well, there’s really not that many, but it has its moments.

Picking up pretty much exactly where Hatchet II left off, with Marybeth (Danielle Harris) splitting Victor Crowley (Kane Hodder) in half with the biggest chainsaw you ever saw, Hatchet III takes you on a visceral and bloody ride through the Louisiana swamps. And, yes, as Kane Hodder told us in our interview with him, they actually filmed on location this time, which obviously adds to the visual authenticity, but also helps the actors get into character.

While Adam Green once again wrote and produced, he handed the directorial reins over BJ McDonnell. This was McDonnell’s directorial debut, and the film was in very capable and familiar hands since he was a camera operator on both Hatchet and Hatchet II. Green was also on set every day, but it appears that he let McDonnell’s own vision come to life.

That vision includes a more menacing and more deliberate Crowley by means bigger, deeper guttural growls; uglier makeup effects (at times there��s some similarities between Victor and the Predator); and straight, greasy hair versus the frizzy top.

While Marybeth is locked up as suspect number one, a disbelieving sheriff’s department investigates the aftermath from which Marybeth has returned and walks right into its own bloodbath. Heads begin to roll as the carnage unfolds and Marybeth is interviewed by an annoying journalist/blogger, Amanda (Caroline Williams), who happens to be the sheriff’s ex-wife and sets Marybeth free. See, Amanda, a mocked believer of the Crowley legend, knows the secret to putting an end to Victor Crowley, and Marybeth is an essential component of that secret.

There’s tons of blood and lots of action in Hatchet III, which is essentially a manhunt film, but I do wish a few points were hit on a little harder. Such as the rocket launcher being used more effectively and maybe some more character development between some of the newcomers. It would have been cooler to see certain characters killed off more violently — yes, I’m that sick. And the coward, keep an eye on him, should have had a scene in which his cowardliness made you hate him.

The Verdict:

This is a straight-up slasher film and worth your attention if you’re in the mood for bloody entertaining violence and nothing more. It has everything this genre needs in the right quantities: humor, violence, blood, creativity, and more. The real nice thing about Hatchet III is that there’s no gratuitous use of cheesy jump scares. When the film ends, you’ll wish it hadn’t.

Rock Hard \m/